


the cycle of violence.

by rotwound



Category: The Last of Us (Video Games)
Genre: Hurt No Comfort, ellie stans are quaking!, from yours truly, here have another angstfic, mentions of abby/owen in a flashback, tlou but make the ending angstier
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-25
Updated: 2020-11-25
Packaged: 2021-03-10 02:14:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,161
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27715957
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rotwound/pseuds/rotwound
Summary: ellie went to santa barbara in hopes of finishing things once and for all — but what if it wasn't  𝘩𝘦𝘳  that finished things? what if her entire plan backfired, and the shores of california brought a different victor?
Comments: 6
Kudos: 9





	the cycle of violence.

𝘢𝘯 𝘦𝘺𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘢𝘯 𝘦𝘺𝘦. 𝘢 𝘵𝘰𝘰𝘵𝘩 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘢 𝘵𝘰𝘰𝘵𝘩. 𝘣𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘥 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘣𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘥.

the cycle of violence is described as a never-ending loop of chaos and destruction, brought on by all those that have been sucked into it. only by one outstanding act of selfhood and viciousness may this cycle be broken, and sometimes — just sometimes — that cycle is broken by death and all its harbingers. 

the cycle is broken. 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘢𝘵 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘤𝘰𝘴𝘵?

there is a desolation within the finality of death. the slow, incoming waves on the shores of santa barbara; the way in which the gulls loom ever closer with each passing day, picking upon the long-dead hanging from the pillars next to her and rotten flesh of those that had succumbed to the unrelenting californian heat before her. in the end, she wonders, will she see her father again? owen, manny; are they waiting for her, if there ever shall be such a thing as life after death? and what about lev — will he see yara again, when he passes, too? 𝘰𝘩, 𝘭𝘦𝘷. abigail can hardly raise her head to blink sand from bloodshot eyes and gaze out at the small, slumped figure mere feet away from her. tied and bound like a slab of meat. 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘣𝘰𝘵𝘩 𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦. left out to rot by the rattlers after she tried to escape, some days ago. time had been all but lost of her, hours blending into days and days blending into weeks... 𝘥𝘢𝘮𝘯 𝘪𝘵, she thinks, was this all her fault? has she failed lev; her only forward goal?

amongst the toll of famine and exhaustion, abigail does not notice to comprehend the fire raging some yards away as the rattlers’ base is engulfed by the flame of destruction and the prisoners that have been set free — she only moves to notice when a slim, lithe form appears in front of her, and through tired eyes it takes a handful of seconds before she recognises the short-haired woman: 𝘦𝘭𝘭𝘪𝘦. sunburnt skin furrows into a look of confusion and desperation, and she murmurs out two words upon a dry tongue, “ 𝘪𝘵’𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶. “

but ellie does not open her mouth to speak; guilt and confusion war upon her expression and abby cannot turn her head to see the woman when she walks behind her to loosen her ties with the blade of her knife. abby’s starved and beaten form crashes to the ground at second’s passing and her core screams with pain as the californian sand bites into fresh wounds, but she doesn’t care about that — she cares only about lev, as she scrambles to her feet so she may unbind him, too. “ lev, “ she breathes out his name; it scratches from her throat but her mind races as he falls to the ground and she cups his cheek just so. the only indication of his livelihood is a pathetic cough from wind-soaked lungs and her heart wrenches; 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘪𝘵, she thinks?

“ abby, “ he coos out to her as she unties his binds, and the woman can only risk a glance back at ellie as she stands there, confused green eyes upon them.

“ i got you, “ abigail confirms to him, and with all the strength she can muster she slings her arms around him and lifts his small body with shaking limbs. “ 𝘪 𝘨𝘰𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶. “ she repeats, a fervid whisper as she only hopes lev may hear her. turning towards the beach brings ellie back into sight, and still she stands like a statue made of stone; switchblade in hand, mouth half-open as if words lingered on her tongue but did not bid themselves to leave. “ there are boats this way, “ she murmurs to the woman before her; ellie does not seem to have fared any better than she and any quick glance would have told her that. she stands slumped to one side, blood staining her shirt like a deep maroon sunset. would any of them make it? their pasts are something of that only as abigail makes her way towards the shore — death is too close upon her neck to care about vengeance now and she sees not a nemesis when she looks at ellie, but a stranger and that entire. merely someone ellie had become in the year they’d gone without seeing each other.

two boats emerge from the outcrop of sand and abby heads for the nearest one, but before she reaches it she looks back at ellie — and blue-brown eyes linger upon her, over her. ellie is broken, just as she is. 𝘴𝘰 𝘨𝘰𝘥𝘥𝘢𝘮𝘯 𝘣𝘳𝘰𝘬𝘦𝘯 by the lives they have led and what has been done to them as a result of it. perhaps she is making sure ellie still follows her; perhaps there is guilt inside her heart yet, for the things she has done. for the lives she has taken. but despite this she continues, silently, ever so slowly lowering lev’s fragile body onto the gentle bobbing of the boat in the water. the cold, lapping ocean bites at her ankles but she ignores it — ignores everything, for lev. and as she goes to untie the boat from its pier, she hears the water wake behind her — it’s ellie, she knows.

“ i can’t let you leave. “ she hisses the words on exhaustion’s tongue, and they freeze abigail in her spot. 𝘯𝘰, she thinks. 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘴𝘯’𝘵 𝘨𝘰𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘦𝘯 𝘢𝘨𝘢𝘪𝘯.

“ i’m not doing this. “ the blonde murmurs, and continues to untie the salt-covered ropes that kept the boat anchored. but this does not stop ellie — by the vengeance in her heart she grabs abigail by the hair and throws her down into the ocean’s tide, and she is hardly able to catch herself with sand gritted between her fingers. 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘧𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘣𝘢𝘤𝘬, she tells herself. 𝘴𝘩𝘦'𝘭𝘭 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘱 𝘪𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵- thoughts are interrupted by a sear of pain as ellie’s shoe collides into her gut and she falls sideways into the water once more. “ no, “ she breathes out — almost begs, “ i’m not going to fight you. “

“ yes you will. “ ellie murmurs, and her tone is just as pleading. again she reaches for her switchblade, but this time, she points it at lev; presses the blade just so against his neck as he lay there, motionless, upon the boat abby had laid him in.

“ he’s not a part of this. “ abby tries to reason with her — but in her heart she knows. ellie was not going to back down. 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦𝘴, 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦𝘴, 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘺𝘤𝘭𝘦 𝘮𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘣𝘦 𝘣𝘳𝘰𝘬𝘦𝘯 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘢 𝘥𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘩. 

“ you made him a part of this. “ her breathing hitches inside her chest but despite her exhaustion ellie is unrelenting, holding the knife steady against lev’s throat.

and amidst the scene, abby encounters a flashback; a nightmare of sorts, as she remembers the scent of iron filling her lungs when she found owen dead upon the floor of the aquarium, having been killed by ellie and none other in her path of self-righteous indignation and so-called justice. 𝘯𝘰... she wouldn’t let that happen again. she wouldn’t let this 𝘣𝘪𝘵𝘤𝘩 take a single soul from her, 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘢𝘨𝘢𝘪𝘯.

“ okay. “ the blonde murmurs, and slowly she stands. “ 𝘰𝘬𝘢𝘺. “ with an idle flick of her wrist she gestures for ellie to back away from lev; that she’ll fight her. and so ellie relents for her compromise; she backs away from lev, but her eyes never leave abby. 𝘴𝘰 𝘣𝘦 𝘪𝘵, she thinks, and once more she musters what little strength she has left to charge at ellie, tackling her to the ground in an attempt to free the switchblade from her hands and overpower her. her attempt is slated when ellie kicks at her again, landing the cool metal of her blade across abby’s shoulder in a swift slicing motion that sends her backwards, quickly. “ 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬! “

upon the cool dawn of the twilight zone fists fly at each other with exhausted reverie, tales of a rage long dead written upon blood shed into the water to be swept away come the inevitable tide. abby punches ellie; ellie lands her blade into abby’s shoulder; and in their fighting they dance macabre, sidestepping to avoid another infliction of violence yet try as they might they charge forward again moments later. swung arms entangle and ellie holds abigail’s starved form against her as she pushes with all her might to sink her blade into her throat — but just the same abby pushes back, adrenaline powered by the will to live overpowering ellie in that sole moment as she twists out of her grasp and both women land once more in the ocean’s throws.

in this moment of adrenaline abigail charges and pins ellie down against the sand beneath the water — she’s managed to grab ahold of the switchblade in the confusion and with all her remaining strength she forces the blade down, ears piercing with the agonised screams rupturing ellie's throat as cool metal sinks into her chest. for a moment abby is vulnerable, and ellie knocks her off again, ripping the switchblade out of her chest with a guttural cry — but abigail is back on her again, and thrown from her hands is the blade as it disappears into dark waters. ellie opens her mouth to scream but water fills her lungs without warning as abby holds her under, pinning her beneath the water as she kicks and thrashes helplessly. green eyes lay open wide with fresh terror as abigail's hands grip like vices upon ellie's throat and hold her under, unable to breath, bubbles rising to the surface of the water as she screams. amidst it all abigail feels hot tears sting her cheeks, and her mind drifts somewhere far away — somewhere that had become so unfamiliar with time's passing that she hardly recognises it at first.

" who did this to you? " owen's voice is a soft coo that fills her mind like thick honey, and blond lashes flutter to look at the auburn-haired man next to her. with their bodies entangled, he draws his finger carefully over the bruised skin of her throat — and he's so gentle… he always was, with her. before they went astray.

" i was ambushed by some scars. they strung me up and tried to kill me, but… these 𝘬𝘪𝘥𝘴, they… they saved me. " abby murmurs, and blue-brown eyes are contemplative as they stare at her estranged lover. " they called them apostates. i guess we saved each other, back there. but the little girl, they held her down and beat her arm with a 𝘩𝘢𝘮𝘮𝘦𝘳 until she- "

" abby, " owen murmurs her name, and concern douses his expression — he cups her cheek, gently stroking freckled skin with his thumb just as an artist would to his unbrushed canvas. " it's okay. i'm sorry. " he whispers to her, consolation in his every word. their lips meet in a soft communion seconds later; a kiss that lasts until they are both left breathless in each other's loving embrace. " i missed you. " he confesses to her in a mere whisper, and her eyes shut tight with emotion. 

" i thought you hated me. " abby doesn't make eye contact with him — instead she stares down at his chest, where her hand lay gently over his heart, feeling his every beat against her palm. 

" i don't. 𝘪 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥𝘯'𝘵. " he assures her, brown eyes softening as they stare at her.

" then why have you been avoiding me ever since we came back from jackson? i- " 

" because i 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 you, abby. " owen says to her with a burning conviction written upon his expression, an unbridled emotion that had been caged for years — and with those three words having been spoken her heart breaks inside her chest, and she crumbles like ash to an unstoked flame in his arms. 

tears sting blue eyes, and the warmth and comfort of owen's arms fade around her until all she is left with is the biting cold of the ocean at dawn — underneath her, ellie still writhes helplessly. for just a moment, before owen crossed her mind again, abigail almost let ellie go. but a bloodthirst unhinged looms over blue eyes at the memory of her dead lover, and with a sudden rage-filled strength the blonde shoves ellie down into the water harder, watching as the life is choked out of burning lungs until the girl with mouse-brown hair falls slack in her arms, emerald eyes staring somewhere far-off, unshut in her last moments. 

abby stays still for a few hesitant moments — almost afraid to move, as if ellie was merely playing coy, and that she would spring back up at any second and kill her; or worse yet, to kill 𝘭𝘦𝘷. minutes pass and ellie’s body sways with the gentleness of the incoming waves, and finally abigail releases her grip from the smaller woman’s throat and doubles back; sitting on her knees in the ocean she sobs out, not an inch of her body left without trembling.

the cycle is broken. 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘢𝘵 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘤𝘰𝘴𝘵?


End file.
